


One Heart Only

by SansSerif



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Angst, F/M, Parallel Universe, Season/Series 04, Tea
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-11
Updated: 2013-03-11
Packaged: 2017-12-04 23:45:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/716432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SansSerif/pseuds/SansSerif
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alone with her new Doctor for the first time, Rose needs to come to terms with who he is -- post Season 4</p>
            </blockquote>





	One Heart Only

They sat together on the balcony of the mansion, each cradling a cup of Jackie’s best tea. She’d delivered it with a knowing smile and made herself scarce, leaving the two of them together alone for the first time in a couple days. Leaving them not knowing where to begin.

The Doctor broke the silence. “A whole new universe, brand new for us.” He turned his head to grin at Rose but she didn’t even look at him, clutching her cup as if it would save her from drowning in whatever was going on in her mind.

“I’ve been living here for years now,” she answered, her voice low enough that he couldn’t tell what she was thinking. “It’s not new, it’s been here just as long as yo— our proper one has been.”

“Tell me about your life, then,” the Doctor coaxed, shifting his chair to face her. “What’s it like here?”

Rose just shrugged and didn’t say anything. A couple moments passed before the Doctor set his cup down on the ledge of the railing and reached over, setting his hand on her arm. “I’m him,” he reminded her for what he was sure was not going to be the last time. “Same memories. Same Doctor.”

Silence ensued as Rose refused to meet his eyes, taking a sip of tea and gazing at the lawn where Peter and Tony had just come out to play on.

“I won’t ever change, that’s the best part. Remember how scared you were that I would leave, change again? I can’t do that. I’m human, like you.”

Rose bit her lip, tightening her hands on her cup further. Knowing her well enough, the Doctor waited for her to speak. “It was my whole life,” she finally said, her voice rough with tears. “All my life here. I was working to get back to you.”

“And you have me,” he replied gently. “Isn’t that good?”

“It can’t be the same.”

“No, I know it can’t be. But we’re together, Rose. Isn’t that what matters? Isn’t that what you wanted?” His voice betrayed him, a pleading note coming into it. 

No answer. Rose took another sip of her tea before setting her cup down, shifting in her chair to face him. “How can you be him, Doctor? How can you really be him? You’re two different people. I don’t even _know_ you.”

“You do know me. I’m the Doctor. I’m _your_ Doctor.”

“You’re not him.” Rose looked up, meeting his eyes and searching them as if she wanted his answer to contradict hers but as if she could never believe it.

Reaching over, the Doctor slipped his hands into hers. “Look at me. Do I look different? Do I sound different? I’m the Doctor that you knew. Yes, I’ll change and grow like you do and in twenty years time I probably will not be the same as him but you won’t be the same either. We can grow together, Rose. Like we both wanted.”

“That wasn’t you…” she whispered but with less conviction.

“He wanted you happy. He knew that he could never be with you, truly make you happy, but that’s what he wanted. You broke through universes to be with him, Rose. He wanted to grant you that wish. _I_ want to grant you that wish.”

“Did he love me?” she asked, searching his eyes. “Did he love me like he loved all those other women?”

“ _I_ love you _,_ Rose,” the Doctor answered. “I love you and I don’t want anything more than for us to grow old together, to live the adventure of a human life, both of us. Like we were never able to before.”

She shook her head, looking away from him as if the sight of his face was too painful for her eyes. Sighing, the Doctor tugged on her hands until she reluctantly stood. He pulled her down onto his lap, hugging her against his chest. Slipping his hand into hers, he brought it up to feel his heart. “Feel this?” he said softly. “One heart. Time Lord and Human. I am him, I have his mind, but this time I can be yours, Rose Tyler. I’m your Doctor now.”

Staying still, the Doctor watched as Rose held her hand against his heart. And when she tilted her head to look up at him, he was ready with a kiss and a soft hand to brush away her tears because he knew how her own heart was being torn in two. 

*****

The remains of their tea had gone cold by the time Rose’s tears stopped and the Doctor had kissed away their salty trails. She slid off his lap and stood on colt-shaky legs, taking the careful steps away from her other Doctor and learning to love this new one. He came up behind her as she leaned on the railing, looking down at her parents and their young son below. His arms slipped around her waist and she shifted so that she could nearly tuck herself under his chin.

“I’ll need to get a job,” he mused. “Start this life properly. Need a name, too.”

“You are _not_ using John Smith,” she said, leaning against him, a tremulous smile coming to her face.

“What’s wrong with John Smith?” he asked, indignant. “It’s simple.”

“It’s too fake. And if you’re human now you need a real name. You’re not pretending this time.”

“No, I’m not pretending. I’m staying for real this time.” He slid those long fingers under her chin, tilting her head back for a kiss. She closed her eyes, letting herself relax without the fear that he would pull back and tell her that he didn’t get involved with his companions.

“We’ll find you a real, proper name,” she said when they broke the kiss. “One that fits.”

“One that fits you too,” he answered with a smile, more daring now that he could tell that he was accepted. She cocked an eyebrow in question, not understanding. “You’re not going to stay a Tyler all your life, are you? I know I’m older than you but that never stopped us before…”

“Oh.” Rose turned in his arms, burying her face in his neck. Her Doctor wanted to marry her. She had always dreamt of this, why was it so confusing, so overwhelming?

“Unless you want to stay a Tyler..?” He pulled back but she didn’t let him, hugging him tight.

“I want a proper courtship from you, mister,” she said, trying to keep her voice light and teasing. “Mum’ll give you hell if we rush into it.”

“What, stealing you away for a couple years in a blue box doesn’t count as courtship?”

“You don’t have the blue box anymore, do you? You’ll have to do it the normal, human way.”

“I’ll court you any way you like, Rose Tyler. Any way that means you’ll say yes. We’ve been through a lot together and I don’t intend to lose you now.”

“Nor do I,” she replied, muffled by his jacket. “I’m never losing you again, Doctor. Never letting you out of my sight.”

“Never?” He gently pushed her away so that he could see her face, smiling.

“Never,” she answered with her own smile and leaned forward for a kiss.


End file.
